birth control....

ahhh, birth control. my favorite.  Hazel turned 2 a couple weeks ago and the time just flies. it's very odd when you sit down and analyze your own childhood in relation to the fact that a whole new childhood is unfolding before you. there are alot of experiences that you want to sheild your kids from, but you can't. and i think back to alot of the things my mom never knew and realize that it all came out pretty well, and i'm not sure if it was dumb luck that nothing terrible ever happened to me considering some of the situations i put myself in, or if i was really as smart as i thought.
and that brings me back to birth control. it is the biggest challenge that anyone could face to bring up an intelligent, empathetic, responsible person. you can't control every aspect of their experience, so you resign yourself to that fact, but it's giving them the right tools that you must worry about.
the thought of having any more children in this world just doesn't appeal to me. especially considering that there are, in my opinion, just as many stupid and cruel people in the world, if not more, as good people.
a good example was this movie, 'the butterfly effect' that we viewed last weekend. it was very good and original, i thought, but the premise was that childhood experience leads ultimately to what you become in your adult life, and in the movie, one character had the ability to go back in time, already knowing the outcome of events that had already taken place, and change them. meaning well, he tries to repair the damaged lives of his friends, only to make things worse. which brings me to my point...meaning well is one thing, but you never know the true outcome until it's too late.
there are gaggles of stupid, cruel people out there procreating, not thinking once about cause and effect, raising children who will grow to be fucked up individuals who will in turn spawn more fucked up individuals who will cause pain and destruction in the lives of the ones i love.
and the really terrible part is, the same people who i would say are raising their babies all wrong would likely say the same about me. the world is a really fucked up and scary place, after you add people to the equation. i adore my daughter.
My Solemn Oath To The World:
i promise that i shall not bear any more children onto this planet, and i apologize in advance if hazel alice june grows to be a nuclear scientist or a theologist or any other evil practice.
as for me, i say IUD!!!!!!!!!